I finally got around to watching last week’s episode of South Park. Their examination of Scientology was great; almost (but not quite) as great as the piece they did on Joseph Smith and the Book of Mormon.

I had a hard time believing that Stan Marsh would fall for the Scientology crap. After all, he is the group’s skeptic. Stan did a great job debunking John Edward, The Biggest Douche in the Universe as a fraud and swindler.  It seems like he’s always the first to see through the bullshit. 

But then what main character could they have used? Eric Cartman would immediately see right through the bullshit because he’s a scam artist himself. Kyle doesn’t fit in this role. He was taken in by J.E, TBDinU and wouldn’t fall for Scientology. Kenny doesn’t work because no one can understand him. Plus, where would he get the money to join?

I managed to suspend my disbelief of Stan joining the Scientologists, and I enjoyed the show immensely. The portrayal of the Hollywood nut jobs who subscribe to Scientology was hilarious. But the real howler was Parker and Stone’s illustration of Scientology’s core beliefs. I had a hard time convincing Janet that it was accurate, even with the big letters on the screen that said “This is What Scientologist Actually Believe.” When I finally convinced her, her reaction was the same as when I told her that there are people who believe that the Grand Canyon was carved by Noah’s flood: “That’s just sad.”

I expect L. Ron Hubbard’s cult to sue Parker and Stone. And obviously Parker and Stone are expecting the same thing. Stan’s final words to the crowd of Scientologists gathered to hear him speak: “Go ahead. Sue me.”

Technorati Tags: television, religion

The Catholic Church has traditionally opposed science; from Galileo through modern times they’ve always come down on the side of superstition. But today they shocked me when the Vatican’s chief astronomer (I didn’t know they had one) came out against Intelligent Design/Creationism/Flying Spaghetti Monsterism/Other Fairy Tails being taught in science classrooms.  Okay, he didn’t specifically mention Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, but if he had, you can bet he would not approve.

All you Catholics out there can breathe a sigh of relief. You can actively oppose the introduction of fantasies and the dumbing down science classes like they’re doing in Kansas.

And no, before you ask… this won’t get me back into church.

You are an atheist, a rationalist, a believer in the triumph of science and of reason over libido. You can’t stand mumbo jumbo, ritual, spiritual nonsense of any kind, and you refuse to allow for these longings in others.

Astrologers, Scientologists and new–age crystal ball creeps are no different in your view from priests, rabbis and imams. They’re all just weak–minded pilgrims on the road to easy answers. Nature as revealed by science is awesome enough for you, but it’s a nature that needs curbing and taming by us on our evolutionary journey to perfection.

Your heros are Einstein, Darwin, Marx and — these days — Gould, Blakemore, Watson, Crick and Rosalind Franklin. Could you be hiding a little behind those absolutist views, worried that, if you let in a few doubts and contradictory ideas, the whole edifice might crumble? Loosen up a bit and try to enjoy the amazing variety of human belief systems. Don’t worry — it’s unlikely you’ll end up chanting your days away in some distant mountain cult. What kind of humanist are you? Click here to find out.

This article about the Kansas State Board of Education ignoring thousands of dedicated scientists, whole libraries stacked with tons of peer-reviewed research, and overwhelming evidence wasn’t surprising. They’ve been falling for the Discovery Institute’s lies and wishful thinking for years and have been covering their eyes and ears lest they’re exposed to the Dover Pennsylvania trial that clearly showed how vacuous Intelligent Design/Creationism is.

Last night I was watching a rerun of Family Guy on the Cartoon Network. Peter has taken an intelligence test that shows he is retarded. In a scene straight out of Forrest Gump, a doctor is showing Lois an intelligence chart. At the top was “Genius,” followed by “Normal,” then “Retarded.” At the very bottom of the chart, below “Retarded” was “Creationist.” It was beautiful.

I do have to wonder; doesn’t Kansas have any actual universities that teach biology? Shouldn’t they be making a lot of noise about the Kansas School Board’s ignorance of the facts? Or have they dropped education in favor of basketball and football? After all, college sports bring in a lot of money.

It finally hit me this morning: this is an extremely clever plan to raise student’s scores on standardized tests! All they have to do is accept some variation of the answer, “It’s God’s will” and the question will be scored as correct. No student in Kansas will ever have less than a completely correct paper. Let’s look at some examples to see how this would work.

1. What is 5 + 6
a) 56
b) 11
c) -1
d) What God wills it to be.

2. How old is the Earth?
a) 6000 years
b) 4,000,000,000 years
c) No one knows
d) It’s as old as God wants it to be.

3. Essay question. Discuss the social and economic issues that led to the Civil War.
The Civil War started because God willed it to start.

4. What is an adjective?
Grammar is subject to God’s law and is unknowable to mere humans.

See, it works every time! Kansas schools will be ranked as the nation’s finest.

I do have family members in moron occupied Kansas. Any of my brothers or sisters who draw their name for Christmas should seriously consider getting JC and Kathy’s kids some science books written for their age level. It might be nice if they had some books with actual for-real facts in them to counteract what they’ll get in school.

We finally got caught up with the tapes we had piling up. One of the best shows this past week was Criminal Minds. I’ve raved about this show before, and I probably will again. The last episode was absolutely brilliant. Interesting characters, good plot, and well written dialog. I’m glad it was renewed for next season.

South Park’s take on gay marriage was decent, but not great. So far this season they’ve gone from perfection, to watchable, to good. I know you can’t hit a home run every time. This show is still worth watching.

Drawn Together seems to have lost its edge. There’s an occasional line that draws a laugh, but they seem to have run out of ideas already.

The various CSIs were good. I think CSI Miami last week was a rerun, but the others were new. I still think CSI New York is the weakest of the three, but it’s getting better.

I missed My Name Is Earl last week, but I think it was a rerun. I really like this show, especially Earl’s brother.

There were two episodes of The Simpsons on this week, one from (I think) last season and the other their new Tree House of Horrors. I really liked the first one with Ned Flanders making bible films. The Tree House of Horrors had it’s moments.

The best show of the week was Family Guy. The beginning was straight out of Police Squad, complete with the Police Squad theme music. I didn’t think it could get much better than that, but it did. Their attack on the FCC and the FCC’s and religious extemists assault on the First Amendment was inspirational. There probably are government drones who think that one complaint letter means that 1,000,000,000 people were offended by something. Family Guy had me rolling. I hope more shows start pushing back on the FCC and their puritanical policies.

Technorati Tags: television